VIC LEWIS 2012! ^o^

Wha-ho! Hey everyone, It's been awhile! There have been many reasons for this, but I don’t wanna talk about it right now, these last few weeks were too interesting. What I wanna talk about most though is last weekend, which I spent in Canmore at (yup, you guessed it) THE VIC LEWIS FESTIVAL! I already made a post about this, though I didn’t explain much! Well it is a yearly thing, happens every November, and its a thing where a few bands from Calgary get together and... Ignore each-other! Yeah! Anyway, this was a weekend, so lemme break it down for ya like this:

FRIDAY:
Friday was a normal school day for us (considering fridays end at like noon this isnt that big a deal) so this shit just flew by. I had a math quiz that I bombed because seriously if I gave less of a fuck id be taking one.

So anyway, school overed, but apparently the roads were really bad on the way to Canmore so we almost didn’t go, but HEY WE DID ANYWAY because FUCK YOU, NATURE. So we all packed our shit up, drove on a big ass bus to Canmore, unpacked, and not a lot happened that night, except for a big ol game of apples to apples where we actually managed to run out of green cards somehow. Yup. (Helen Keller and Adolf Hitler remain the greatest cards, By the Way)

the night was long and kind of cumbersome, the people in my room were kind of dicks, but more on that later...

SATURDAY:

The day started way too early, and with nothing to sustain me but the shitty hotel coffee that SOMEONE drank ALL OF the night before because APPARANTLY IT HELPS THEM SLEEP, it was kind of a stressful start. Oh yeah, and we were up and out about fourty-five minutes early. Way the fuck to go, everyone -slowclap-

anyway, some other random bullshit happened, we ended up where we were supposed to go, we played our music, and quite beautifully I may add, our adjudicator loved us, ad awesominum.




Other than that, it was a pretty relaxed day of dickin' around an empty high school with nothing to do but watch happy people shove their happiness in my face. Me, being quite fed up with the circumstances, totally ditched and went and got some poutine: Proof that there is indeed some kind of god, and they’re lookin' out for me. It was greasy concession stand poutine, too. Salty, warm, and filthier than what you'd find under Louise's bed. JUST THE WAY I LIKE IT.
Anyway, on with moar Saturday talk. There was a coalition for a tim's run, then it was back to the hotel for a few quick games of Prez, and then back to the school fer the best thing ever. T3H DANCE! LOLZOMGWTFBBQTROMPZORZAGARFZZZZFFGHASDFKLAGKLRASDFZZZSHSHZSHZSBZSHZSHHHHH-*dies*- but k seriously ive never had more fun at a dance than that one. THERE WERE GLOWSTICKS, AND DEADMAU5, AND AND AND THERE WAS KIDS DOING THE MACERENA TO DUBSTEP AND AND AND IT WAS FUCKING RAD! :D Seriously, I had a fucking blast. AND THEN IT GOT RUINED. Remember how I said the people in my room were kind of dicks? Yeah I was speaking in hyperbole. They were superdicks, not even kidding. Fuck, by the end of the night I felt as helpless and unwanted as Piggy from Lord Of The Flies...

BUT WHAT THE FUCK EVER. ONWARDS. THE REST OF THE NIGHT WAS PRETTY FUCKING FUN. I WENT RIGHT TO SLEEP FOR ONCE WHICH WAS REALLY NICE.

SUNDAY. OH DEAR GOD SUNDAY.

You know in Alien, when that guy had the chest burster alien in his stomach? Thats how I felt that morning. And the bacon smell didnt help. THE BACON SMELL. DIDNT FUCKING HELP.
This feeling didnt really go away for quite some time. When I was on the bus I felt like shit. When I was shambling up the steps in the school I felt like shit. When I was trying not to throw up while listening to Aberhart concert Band's set I felt like shit. Eventually I just gave up, pulled my jacket over my head and passed out for a little while. I woke up every so often, cautiously checking my phone to see when my clinic was. When it came about time I sprung to my feet and flailed down the steps through the hallway, and apparated a pair of drumsticks because I fucking could. I didnt question this burst of energy, but accepted it as retribution for the shitty morning I had. It wasnt until after lunch when I bounced back fully. But the more I obtained in vitality I lost in emotional state. I continued to get sadder and sadder, and more and more jealopus of those around me. AND THEN FLETCHER CMAE AND MADE EVERYTHING BETTER BCAUSE THAT KIDS A FUCKING CHAMP. But then I got really lonely and sad again. And then we went home, I bitched about everything, and I went to sleep, not to return to school until after lunch, because band was cancelled, and I had spare second period.

FUCK MR. RENNIFEZ.

Hey children and childre-like people,

Look who the cat dragged back from the dead.


Me? Is it me? Yeah, its me. HAve I gotten over my depression? Eh, it comes and goes. But who cares?

Wanna see some new posts?

Dont answer that, I KNOW YOU DO!

Expect one tomorrow?

More Mental Disorders and other things that suck.

Hey. Guess what? My plan totally fell through.

My initial driving force?
My motivation?
My every inch of feeling I put behind this little blog that thought it could but really, really couldnt?

Yeah. It just deteriorated. Any aspect of desire I had to keep this going has just suddenly died.

...And the worst part?

I know why.

I know why this all fell through.

I know what happened to me.

In case you guys havent noticed, I've been kinda down lately.

I've been very selective as to who I talk about these feelings with (Ive only really told two people whats going on)

One of them being Ms. Barclay, my CALM teacher. (The course sucks, but- this teacher is one super rad lady, I'll get to that in a minute) she picked up and related to this instantly.

She told me it sounded like depression.

Like, not just teen angsty hormonal sad, but actual honest to goodness depression.

This fact scared me. What scared me more is this isnt just something i can repress and run away from. This feeling is something that creeped up on me until I couldn't escape it. It surrounded me. this looming heavy sense of doubt and despair, that little voice in tha bck of my head that kept saying "you can't" making a rapid crescendo.

And it feels absolutely awful.

Some days you dont even feel like living.

Other days you feel like you're not fit for the world around you, like theres something wrong with you. Something so wrong that you dont even belong.

sometimes it just becomes too much, you become so overwhelmed that you cant fight it anymore, so you break down and curl up into this ball, a decrepit shell building around you, just you contained with all of your loud negative feelings. You dont feel ready for the world. You feel totally ready to have the world have its way with you.

I say again, this feels absolutely. Awful.

And the worst part, again?

You dont even know why. You can't figure out the main cause of this awful feeling, and you cant fight it. You just have to sit there. Sit there and deal. Let it become way bigger than you can endure, and let it break you down into nothing.

Ms. Barclay showed me somehting today.
She showed me that there are people out there who are on the same boat as I am.
She showed me there are people out there, that when it feels like the entire world has turned its back on you, there are people that care. there are people that will always care.

...I just really felt the need to share that with you. I havent had a proper update in over four months, and you deserve an explanation.

Macbeth Act One Scenes 1-3

Hey-oooo!

Yup, blowin the dust offa this olld blog.

Oh man. The first scene. So we got three witches in a storm, talkin about meeting again when this awful brutal battle is over. ITs not gonna last too long.

Scene two is dumb. More on that later.
we got some scottish bros talking about a revolt or something. Not a big deal.
Theyre talkin about Macbeth or something. I mean, who is this brouchebag? Oh apparantly hes sone totally badass dude who fucked the Norwegians shit like it was going out of style. This bro was pretty brutal. Carvin up Norwegians, man this is some heavy Black Metal shit up in here. And then MacDouagh. This dude got FUCKED UP. This dude tried to be all turncoat n shit but Macbeth went all God Emperor on his ass. DEATH TO THE HERETIC! So MacBeth totally was OWNING. and then the Viking King of Norway, Lord Fuckwrecker, unleashed an army of viking Beserkers. with storm bolters. This was all told by a soldier. Hes bleedin. OMG im gonna doodle this out. its gonna be sick.

New Schedule.

Yep. Back to school soon. Fun summer, fun summer.

I apologize for the severe lack of quality posts this summer, I was out doin stuff im sorry.

So, anyway to make sure that doesnt happen during grade eleven, Ive decided to start up a schedule.

1.Cap'n Doodles story arc #1 Part 1

2.Registration day

3. Little adventures

4. Cap'n Doodles story arc #1 Part 2

Yep, updatin every sunday like "normal"

Not gonna start till sunday after though. Sorry to get your hopes up everyone. Joey's gotta go on wilderness sabatical. Gotta run away from all the sterff thats weighin him down. Catch ya guys later, stay classy.

The old post makes me kinda sick ish

Hello, weary net travellers.
I am updating just to let you know I aint dead. Just confused.

This blog doesnt matter to me as much as it used to right now.

Ill still post but i dont know what about. things are kinda boring as it stands.

OKAY. BLOGGY BLOG TIME.

I DON’T REMEMBER EVERYTHING FROM MY TRIP BUT I DO REMEMBER YOU. OR LACKTHEREOF. NOT A WHOLE LOT OF YOU IN CALIFORNIA, OREGON, IDAHO, MONTANA, NEVADA. NONE OF THOSE. NO YOU IN ANY OF EM. IT WAS LAME. BUT CALIFORNIA WAS AT LEAST SEMI ENJOYABLE.

I MEAN, SO IS OREGON, UNTIL YA GET INLAND. ON THE COAST IS LIKE, ALL SAND DUNES N SHIT. ITS AWESOME. ITS LIKE, PARKOUR EVERYWHERE. YES. PARKOUR IN THE DEESERT IS FUCKING SICK. LIKE, OH HEY A WALL LETS JUST PRETEND THERES STAIRS THERE. OH HEY IM ON TOP OF IT NOW. LETS SLIDE DOWN ON MY SHOULDER, NO BIG DEAL.

OH OKAY LETS RUN UP A 90 DEGREE SAND DUNE AND VAULT THE ONE ON TOP OF IT OH HEY DID I LAND WRONG NO BIG DEAL ITS LIKE THE SOFTEST SAND EVER JUST ROLL DOWN THAT SHIT LIKE WATER OFF A GOOSES BACK OR SOMETHIN. AND THEN THE OCEAN I GOTTA TLAK ABOUT THE OCEAN. SHIT WAS TIGHT. IT WAS ALL PRETTY N SHIT BUT SWEET BUTTERY JESUS EASTER DINNER IS IT COLD. LIKE, GAD DAMN. ANYWAY FRISCO WAS AWESOME. LIKE REALLY AWESOME. LIKE, THERE ISNT A SINGLE NORMAL PART OF THAT ENTIRE CITY. ITS ALL LIKE, UNIQUE INTERESTING LITTLE PIXELS MAKING ONE AWESOME FUCKING CITY. LIKE WHAT ID MAKE IF I STILL HAD SIM CITY, THEN ID CALL IN UFOS EVERYWHERE AND USE MONEY CHEATS LIKE FUCK. BUT WHATEVER YOU GUYS DON’T COME HERE TO READ ABOUT MY EIGHT YEAR OLD SELF PLAYIN SOME SIM CITY, YOU COME HERE TO READ ABOUT MY MENTAL ILLNESSES AND TO LOOK AT BADLY DRAWN OBLONG TITS. ANYWAY, I’VE BEEN FEELING CREATIVELY STUNTED OR WHATEVER AND HAVE BEEN YEARNING TO TAKE THIS BLOG IN A DIFFERENT DIRECTION. I WANNA BE MORE CREATIVE. MORE CREATIVE MUCH MORE. I WANT THIS BLOG TO HAVE A LITTLE MORE TO IT THAN THE AVERAGE TEENAGERS INTERNET SPACE. A LITTLE LESS ALLIE BROSH RIPOFF, A LITTLE MORE “HOLY SHIT WHO GAVE THIS GUY THE WIFI PASSWORD I MEAN SERIOUSLY” LIKE, INSTEAD OF POSTING A MILDLY INTERESTING ANECDOTE ABOUT HOW MY BORING ASS LIFE IS GOING, I POST LIL COMIC STRIPS N SHIT TOO. COMIC STRIPS ABOUT WHATEVER. WHATEVER I WANT THIS IS MY BLOG NOT THE SYSTEMS I POST WHATEVER I WANT AND THEY HAVE TO DEAL WITH IT. FUCK YOU, SYSTEM I THREW IT ON THE GROOOOUUUUND!!! >.< DAMN, OREGON IS FUCKING GORGEOUS. GRESHAAAAAAAAM. IDK WHAT THAT MEANS I JUST SAID IT AND NOW I CANT UNSAY IT. DEAL WITH IT. OH YEAH, KEITH I GOT YOU SOMETHIN. SOMETHIN COOL. NO NOT A LAMPSHADE FROM RENO SADLY. AND NIKKI I… THINK I GOT YOU SOMETHING? NOT SURE HOW THATLL TURN OUT YET. AND HEY GENEVA IF YOU STILL READ THIS I MIGHT HAVE GOTTEN YOU SOMETHING TOO.

LOL, EVER LOOKED AT A HILL OR WHATEVER AND BEEN LIKE “I WONDER HOW MANY INDIANS POOPED HERE CENTURIES AGO…” YEAH I SAID INDIANS REFERRING TO ABORIGINALS. AGAIN DEAL WITH IT! YOU WANT STRAIGHT-EDGE PC CONTENT GO WATCH YOUR PUBLIC ACCESS TELEVISION. THIS SHIT ISNT PC. ALSO, LISTENING TO NOFX HAS GIVEN ME SOME NEW INSIGHT AS TO HOW TO HATE SOMEONE FOR A PROPER REASON. LIKE, YEAH. ALSO I HATE HATE HATERS. YOU HEARD ME. PEOPLE WHO HATE HATE. I HATE EM. CHEW ON THAT ONE, ABBOT AND COSTELLO. YEAH. SHOWIN YALLS WHATFERR. I KNOW WHATS UP. I KNOW EVERYTHING. IM THE KING OF PORTLAND. I DROVE THROUGH THE ENTIRE FUCKING CITY AND DIDN’T EVEN KNOW. KING OF PORTLAND MATERIAL RIGHT HERE. ALSO I LOVE YOU ALL. A LOT. AND NO IM NOT ANGRY IM JUST GRUMPY. SITTING IN A CAR FOR LONG PERIODS OF TIME WITH NO ONE NEW TO TALK TO DOES THAT TO ME. I NEED LIKE, CONSTANT CONNECTION TO BE HAPPY. I NEED TO HAVE A MEANS TO SOCIALLY STIMULATE MYSELF. I MAY HAVE A PROBLEM. THIS WOULDN’T SURPRISE ME. YEAH, I MIGHT BE A SOCIOPATH. WHO ELSE ISNT SURPRISED. THAT’S WHAT I THOUGHT. WELP, NOW IM DERIVING BACK TO MENTAL ISSUES. OH WELL. DEAL WITH IT. LIKE ALSO, I MIGHT JUST HAVE PROBLEMS. I MEAN IM PRETTY WELL ADJUSTED TO THINGS THAT WOULD BE CONSIDERED MENTALLY SCARRING TO TOHERS MY AGE. MAYBE WERE ALL JUST MELODRAMATIC. I MAY BE MORE STOIC THAN MOST BUT OTHERWISE IM JUST FINE. LIKE ANYONE WOULD CHALLENGE THE KID WHO DOENST FLINCH WHEN HE SEES A FIGHT BREAK OUT ANYWAY. LOL JUST KIDDING IM PROLLY JUST AS FLINCHY AS THE REST OF EM. I REMEMBER IN CALIFORNIA, WE SPENT MOST OF OUR TIME IN FRISCO BUT WE WERE STAYING DOWN IN OAKLAND. OAKLAND HAS A REPUTATION FOR BEING… LIKE FOREST LAWN. THE ENTIRE CITY. YEP. I WOULDN’T EVEN LEAVE THE HOTEL ROOM TO GO TO THE COFFEE SHOP NEXT DOOR. WOULDN’T EVEN GO TO THE POOL OUTISIDE. WELL, THAT ONE CAN BE EXPLAINED IT WAS FUCKING COLD ON THE COAST. LIKE, 68. THAT’S SIGNIFICANTLY LESS THAN 30. AGAIN, FIGURE THAT SHIT OUT. IT’S A MINDFUCK CONVERTING SYSTEMS HERE. MEASURING DISTANCE MAKES SENSE, BUT WEATHER IS LIKE, SHIIIIIIIIIIIITT. WHAT IS THIS I DON’T EVEN. HOW DOES THIS DEVIL SYSTEM WORK TO YOU SOTHERN FOLK. BUT EVERYTHING HERE IS WICKED CHEAP SO THAT’S OKAY. NO I WOULDN’T LIVE HERE. UNLESS ID BE LIVING IN SAN FRANCISCO. IF I CAN HAVE ONE PLACE IN THE ENTIRE WORLD THAT ID DROP MY ENTIRE LIFE FOR ITD BE THERE. JUST I CANT GET HURT. OR SICK OR… HMM… KNOW WHAT FUCK IT. IM HAPPY HERE IN CALGARY. WELLM THERE IN CALGARY, AT THE TIME OF THIS WRITING IM IN THE STATES. WOOOOO ROAD TRIP MORE LIKE RAD TRIP. I LIKE DRIVING MORE THAN FLYING. DRIVING MAKES IT SEEM ALL THE MORE REALISTIC

LIKE THE PLACE I AM VISITING ACTUALLY EXISTS, IT IS REACHABLE. WHEN I FLY ON A PLANE, I FEEL LIKE THE PLANE IS LIKE A PORTAL TO A MYSTICAL REALM AND THE DESTINATION IS IN MAGICAL FAILRYLAND WHERE NOTHING EXISTS AND THE POINTS DON’T MATTER. AWE YEAH WHOSE LINE REFERENCES FTW. MAN IN THE SOUTH IT GETS PRETTY HOT INLAND THOUGH ILL TELL YOU WHAT. LIKE, TRUCK TIRES EXPLODE REGULARLY. I GOT A RUSTY HUBCAP I FOUND ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD IN SOUTHERN IDAHO. IT WAS A LONGASS LINE OF STOPPED CARS ON THE HIGHWAY. WANNA KNOW WHY? SEMI TRUCK ALL THE WAY AT THE FRONT OF THE LINE FUCKIN BLEW UP. I LOOKED IN THE DITCH AND I FOUND A RUSTY OL HUBCAP FROM LIKE, YEARS AGO, ALSO FOUNF AN OVERGROWN EXPLODED TIRE AND A RUSTY ASS AXEL. AND A BUNNY. FUCK YEAH, BUNNIES. OH AND LOTSA BURRS. HOW DID I KNOW? I WAS WEARIN SHORTS AND I WAS BLEEDIN A LITTLE. WELL FUCK. ANYWAY, BOYEE I SWEAR A LOT. SORRY. ALSO THE CAPS THING. IVE GROWN USED TO IT BUT IDK ABOUT YOU GUYS. HERE ILL MAKE IT A LITTLE EASIER ON US HERE. THERE DOUBLE SPACED. WHATNOW, FUNDAMENTALISTS? FUNDAMENTALISTS ARE ALWAYS FINDIN SOMETHIN TO YELL ABOUT. YELL ABOUT ME YELL ABOUT MY PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE YELLING. YEAH. DO SOME GOOD FOR THE WORLD WHY DON’T YOU. NO FUN IN FUNDAMENTALISM. OR FOX NEWS. YEAH. HEY SEAN HANNITY WHY DON’T YOU COMPARE ME TO TERRORISM? AM I BETTER OR WORSE? YEAH, CAUSE YOUR OPINION IS TOTALLY LAW TO ME. WOW WHERE DID THIS COME FROM. THIS IS A LONGASS POST. WELL, IM TIRED OF WRITIN SHORT ASS POSTS SO HERES A LONG ONE. THIS IS MY “THE DECLINE”. MAN I AM GETTING ALL UP IN THE ADMINISTRATIONS SHIT ARENT I. TALKIN ABOUT THINGS I KNOW SHITFUCKALL ABOUT. LIKE FUNDAMETNALISM AND THE NEWS. HMM… SO HOW ABOUT THAT COLONOL GADHAFFI? AND… UHM… MAN IDK THE NEWS HERE IN THE US FUCKIN SUCKS. ITS LIKE, ALL JUST THE DUMB SHIT GOIN ON HERE NOT THE WORLD AROUND. ITS ALL NATIONALIST CRAP. MORE BULLSHIT CONSPIRACIES ABOUT BARACK OBMAMA, AND KIM KARDASHIANS ASS. SERIOUSLY ITS REALLY DUMB HERE, YOU COME TO THE US, YOU BECOME BLINDFOLDED AND SHUT OFF FROM THE REST OF THE WORLD WHEN YOU TURN ON YOUR TV. BUT I KINDA WISH CANADA WAS KINDA LIKE THAT. LIKE THE NEWS COVERED OUR GOVERNMENT. EVERYONE JUST ASSUMES WERE PEACHY-KEEN BUT NO WERE NOT WERE IN A CONVOLUTED SYSTEM WHERE OUR HONORABLE CHANCELLO- OOPS “PRIME MINISTER” IS GIVEN EVERY POWER FOREVER. HE MAKES BILLS, AND IF THE CABINET DOESN’T LIKE THEM, HE GETS A NEW CABINET THAT DOES. WE NEVER HEAR ABOUT IT SURE BUT HE FUCKIN DOES IT. ALSO, IM DONE WITH THIS CONSERVATIVE GONVERNMENT CATERING TO THE BIG BUSINESSES AND FUCKING OVER THE CITIZENS. ALSO HOW BIASED AND ONE-SIDED OUR LOCAL MEDIA IS. SERIOUSLY. FUCK YOU, CALGARY SUN. I MISS MY GLOBE AND MAIL. GIVE IT BACK. BUT MORE ABOUT HOW WERE SLOWLY MELTING FROM SOCIALISM TO CAPITALISM AND GETTING JUST AS FUCKED UP AS THE STATES, IN WHICH WE ARE BEING FINANCIALLY RUN BY THE TRANSNTAIONALS AND NOT OUR POILITICAL STAFF. WHAT THE FUCK AM I SAYING DID I JUST SAY THAT? JESUS. SORRY, I ACTUALLY HAVE NO IDEA WHATS GOING ON, IM JUST PRETENDING TO SOUND SMART. I MEAN, IM PRETTY SURE IF I REVIEW MY ONE SIDED WESTERN CANADIAN SOCIAL TEXTBOOKS AND GOT A GOOD FIRM GRIP ON WHAT THE GOVERNMENT-ISSUED EDUCATION SYSTEM WANTS ME TO BELIEVE, “EVERYTHINGS OKAY. THE EAST HAS IT UNDER CONTROL. INSTEAD OF LEARINING ABOUT HOW GOERNMENTS HAVE FUCKED UP OVER THE YEARS LEARN ABOUT HOW SMOOTH AND PERFECT OURS IS.” FUCK YOU, MISS DAISY I WANNA KNOW THE TRUTH. HI, IM JOEY, IM FANTASTIC AND IM ROYALLY PISSED. SERIOUSLY IM NOT TRYING TO MAKE A JOKE HERE. BUT HERES A SBAHJ REFERENCE FOR YOUR ASS.

WERE GETTING BROAD SIDE SCHOOL FED UP THE BONE BULGE!

YEAH, I SAID IT. SCHOOL FED. OUR EDUCATION SYSTEM IS BLOCKING OUT IMPORTANT INFORMATION AND GIVING US BULLSHIT. MY BIG BROTHER DIDN’T HAVE TO LEARN ABOUT GLOBALIZATION AND NATIONALISM, NIETHER DID MY PARENTS. THEY LEANRED ABOUT THE USSR AND THE BERLIN WALL. THEY LEARNED ABOUT WWII. THEY LEARNED ABOUT ALL THAT. ITS SOME HARRY POTTER MINISTRY BULLSHIT GOING ON HERE.

BLAH. IM JUST RIDDEN WITH IGNORANT TEEN ANGST AND I WANT TO BE MAD AT MY GOVERNMENT EVEN THOUGH I DON’T HAVE A REASON TO BE. FUCK.

BUT I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW MORE. I WANT RAW KNOWLEDGE HERE. ABOUT THE GOVERNMENT, ABOUT THE EDUCATION SYSTEM. ABOUT THE INEQUALITY AND HYPOCRICY. I MEAN, IM ONLY IN GRADE ELVEN, AHVENT LEARNED EVERYTHING YET BUT THE WAY THINGS HAVE BEEN GOING THE LAST ELEVEN YEARS IT DOESN’T LOOK LIKE IM GONNA GET TO UNLESS I TAKE ACTION OF SOME KIND. AGH IM GONNA HAVE TO RESEARCH MYSELF! GOOD GOD! EVER SINCE FAT MIKE BROUGHT OUT TEGAN AND SARA AND LIKE SAID “THESE TWO KNOW ABOUT HOW FUCKED UP YOUR GOVERNMENT IS” I WANNA KNOW TOO. I WANT TO BE AWARE OF THE TRUE HYPOCRACY

I WANT A REASON TO BE ANGRY SO I CAN BE COOL LIKE TEGAN AND SARAAAA!!!!

WOW WHAT A FUCKING LAME BABY POSER I AM.

FUCK, OREGON IS XBOXHEUG. XBOX LIEK WATER!

ALSO I WANNA GET MY LEANRERS WHEN I GET HOME.

NIKKI! …GIVE ME A RIDE TO THE AMA PLEASE? OK COOL.

ANYWAY, THIS IS LIKE, FOUR AND A HALF PAGES LONG. SICK. LETS KEEP IT GOING. WHOEVER READS THIS WHOLE THING EMAIL ME. ILL KNOW CAUSE THERES GONNA BE A REDICULOUSLY EASY QUESTION AT THE END AND I WANT YOUR ANSWER IN AN EMAIL. OR A GMAIL MESSAGE OR AN ACTUAL LETTER OR YOU CAN WRITE IT IN LAMBS BLOOD ON MY WALLS WHEN IM ASLEEP. THE GIRLFREIND AND I JUST LOVE IT! ONE THING I NEVER GOT. THE WORD FRIEND.I BEFORE E OR E BEFORE I? THIS IS ALL MS. VERNEYS FAULT. I SPELLED JUST FINE BEFORE HER ASS CAME AND WRECKED MY SHIT. HMM. BUT WELL WHATEVER I DEAL WITH IT LIKE A MAN. I SHOULDN’T BE TOO MAD AT HER. SHE GOT ME OUT OF GYM EVERY WEDNESDAY IN GRADE NINE. SHIT WAS TOO SICK. LIKE, ISTEAD OF PLAYING OUTSIDE WITH MY FRIENDS I GET SO SIT IN AN EMPTY CLASROOM AND DO MATH THAT THE OTHER KIDS DON’T HAVE TO DO?

THANKS A METRIC FUCKTON, MS. VERNEY!

MAN I LOVES ME SOME CAPSLOCK. IF THIS IS DIFFICULT TO READ FOR YOU GUYS, I APOLOGIZE. BUT HEY, YOURE STICKING THROUGH WITH IT AND I RESPECT THAT. YOU GUYS ARE TOUGH. YOU HAVE EARNED MY RESPECT. HOWS THAT FOR YOU. GOOD. IM GLAD. ANYWAY, WELL SURE THIS IS IN ALL CAPS, BUT AT LEAST ITS LIKE, SEMI GRAMTATICALLY CONSCIOUS. IF YOU TAKE ISSUE WITH MY WRITING, I HAVE A COMPLAINT LINE. YEAH, CALL TOLL-FREE AT 1-800-KISS-MY-ASS. SHIT ACTUALLY DON’T CALL THAT ONE. IT MAY ACTUALLY BE A REAL NUMBER. I DON’T REALLY HAVE A COMPLAINT LINE, THAT WAS JUST A JOKE. HAHA? THAT’S WHAT I THOUGHT. ANYWAY, I GOT SO CAUGHT UP IN MY BULLSHIT THAT I NEVER STOPPED TO ASK HOW YOUR DAY IS GOING. HOW ARE THINGS WITH YOU? THAT’S NICE. ITS GOOD THAT WE ARE ABLE TO TALK LIKE THIS. DON’T BE A STRANGER NOW, YOU HEAR? YOURE A GOOD FRIEND. ANYWAY, IM LOST AS FUCK. I DON’T EVEN KNOW IF IM IN THE US ANYMORE, LET ALONE OREGON. BUT IF SO, I MADE IT THROUGH THE OREGON TRAIL WITHOUT DYING OF DYSENTARY. HELL, I DINT EVEN POOP. YEP JUST THOUGHT ID SHARE THAT WITH YOU. POOP. BUT SERIOUSLY WHERE THE FUCK AM I LOL. OH IM STILL ON THE OREGON TRAIL. MAAAAN! THIS IS TAKING FOREVERRRRR!!!!! I WANA SLEEP BUT THE CAFFEINE IS JUST TOO MUCH TO BEAR. NO BEARS. NONE. NO BEARS, NO YOU. THIS SUCKS. THIS SONG REMINDS ME OF LATE MARCH WHEN I WAS JUST GETTING INTO PARKOUR. I THOUGHT I WAS SO COOL BUT THEN EVERYONE ELSE TRIED DOING IT. ONLY DONOVAN GOT INTO THE ADVANCED SHIT THOUGH. I MASTERED THE VAULT AND THE JUMP. DONOVAN WENT FUCKIN SPIDERMAN NINJA ON DEM SHITS. BUT I CERTAINLEY LEANRED SOME NEW SHIT ON THE DUNES I TELL YOU WHAT.

I WISH EVERYTHING WAS MADE OF THAT SAND. ID WALK AROUND BARE FEET EVERWHERE AND I’D FUCKING JUST RUN SUPER FAST. NO BIKE NO CAR JUST RUN. RUN. THERES A HILL? 90 DEGREES? RUN UP DEM SHITS. DIG YOUR FEET RIGHT INTO THE SIDE. FUCKING FLY. I MISS THE SAND DUNES. IT WAS TOO MUCH FUN. TOO MUCH TOO GOOD TOO GOOD. MIND BLASTING. HAHA. DOORNAILS. THE DUDE FROM OLD MAN MARKLEY HELP WITH THIS ONE. IM STILL TALKIN ABOUT THAT SHOW, IT WAS ALSO TOO GOOD. FUCK BRO THIS SUMMERS BEEN GOOD TO ME MAN.I WANNA HUG IT. OH SHIT SON SOME SOCIAL DS COME ON THE ITUNES. THIS IS A BAND THAT JUST, PEIRCES YOUR HEART AND JUMPS INSIDE YOU, MAKES YOU SEE ALL THE THINGS YOU’VE DONE IN A DIFFERENT LIGHT. I MEAN, IM ONLY SIXTEEN I DON’T HAVE ANY MAJOR REGRETS THAT I HAVENT REVERSED BUT YOU KNOW OTHERS MIGHT. BUT THIS ALBUM IN PARTICULAR JUST GETS ME YOU KNOW? ITS LIKE… DAMN… LIKE SAD SAD BLUESY STUFF. ITS DARK SHIT. IVE BEEN THROUGH SHIT WITH THIS BAND. LIKE, ITS JUST LIKE AN EMOTIONAL BLANK INK TIDAL WAVE OF LOVE, PAIN AND THE WHOLE FUCKED UP CROOKED WORLD GONE WRONG WE THRIVE IN. COMIN FROM A MAN WHOSE SEEN IT ALL, WHOSE BEEN THERE, ALWAYS, WHOSE GOT HIS SCARS TO SHOW AND HIS PENNIES TO KEEP. HMM. THAT’S GOOD. MAD PROPS TO MIKE NESS. HE DESERVES IT. MIKE NESS, MIKE BERKETT, AND TIM ARMSTRONG ARE WHOMOFWHICH I OWE MY TEENAGED LIFE AND MAYBE A LITTLE MORE TO. OH GOD UNTITLED. SUCH A SAD SONG. THIS IS WHAT MADE THE TEARS FREEZE ONTO MY FACE AT THE BUS STOP. THIS IS WHAT MADE MY FEELINGS BLEED INTO INK. THIS IS WHEN THINGS REALLY GOT INSIDE ME AND I REALIZED HOW I WAS ACTING WAS HURTING EVERYBODY. AND THERE ARE PEOPLE IN LIFE THAT WOULD ALWAYS BE THERE FOR ME, AND I WAS DISSAPOINTING THEM AND THEY WERE TURNING THEIR BACK. EVERYTHING JUST PILED UP AND IT JUST… FUCKING BOILED OVER. I FELL APART AND IT STUCK WITH ME FOR MONTHS ON END. I WASN’T ME. I WAS GETTING SICK ALL THE TIME, I WAS PICKIN FIGHTS, ARGUING FOR THE FUCK OF ARGUING. IT WAS JUST A BAD SCENE. BUT THEN I DUNNO WHAT HAPPENED, I EVENTUALLY FOUND SOLACE I GUESS. BUT YEAH, IT WASN’T FUN THEN. I CARRIED THIS BURNING JEALOUSY, THIS LOOMING CLOUD OF INADEQUACIES AND INSECURITIES. IT FOLLOWED ME EERYWHERE BUT EVENTUALLY I FOUND THE SUN. I WOKE UP AND REALIZED THAT THIS IS LIFE. ITS CROOKED, ITS FUCKED UP, BUT ITS THERE. ID RATHER FEEL THAT THAN NOTHIN AT ALL. AND THEN AS I ACCEPTED THIS I STARTED FEELING GREATNESS IN MY WEAKNESSES AND FOSTERING AND BUILDING ON MY TALENTS. I BECAME A BETTER PERSON, I BECAME MORE SELF CONFIDENT AND THAT’S ACTUALLY HOW THIS BLOG CAME AROUND. SOCIAL DISTORTION AND A LOT OF SELF ANALYSING. I AM ONE TOUGH MOTHERFUCKER, WHOSE BEEN THROUGH SOME TOUGH SHIT, NOT TOUGHER THAN SOME, BUT GOD DAMN, PRETTY FUCKING TOUGH. THROUGH THESE EYES, IVE SEEN LOVE AND IVE SEEN HATE. IVE SEEN THE VIOLENCE AND THE TEARS, THROUGH THESE EYES, IVE LEARNED TO WALK A STRAIGHTER LINE, IVE SEEN THE THINGS IN LIFE YOU DON’T WANNA SEE. I LIKE THIS CAPS BUSINESS. LIKE I SAID BEFORE. OKAY. WELL, THIS IS LIKE… SIX AND A HALF PAGES NOW, AND THAT’S LIKE, 16 TREES IN DOG YEARS ON ZIMBABWE TIME. SO THIS IS A HEFTY HEFTY HEFTY POST. HEFTY. ANYWAY YOU GUYS HAVE STUCK THROUGH THIS FAR SO IMMA AXE YOU A QUESTION

CHOP?

NOW IMMA ASK YOU A QUESTION. FIND A WAY TO TELL ME THE ANSWER SO I KNOW YOU READ THIS ALL.

HOW DOES ONE GO ABOUT HUGGING THE SUMMER?

THANK YOU FOR YOUR TENACITY AND YOUR READING THIS WEIGHTY MOTHERFUCKER. ILL BE KICKIN AROUND SOON ENOUGH AND TRUST ME, WHEN I GET THERE, YOU’LL KNOW >;D